Friends: Reflections of a Roman Catholic Woman Priest

Jesus said “I CALL YOU MY FRIENDS” (John 15:15b)

One of the greatest gifts we can receive is friendship. Throughout Creation beings of all sorts have a need and desire for like creatures to share life with. Above are Socks and Velvet, two of my kitties who have been friends for over nine years as they lived out their lives with me and our family. Socks is the beautiful Maine Coon type kitty on the left. He was as sweet as he was beautiful. He and Velly loved to cuddle and just be together. Socks went home to our loving God last week after an illness with me and Velly at his side and other kitties near. Velly has been lost without him. So have I. Our beloved pets can also be our closest friends. I am so thankful for their time with us.

I have been thinking about friendship lately, probably because it becomes more precious as life goes on and we have fewer friends surviving and fewer opportunities to make new friendships. Friends move away, to return to their home States or to be closer to family; and friends, like our pets, get sick and go home to God, their Creator. I have lost many friends and each one takes a piece of my heart. In the past two years two more close and special friends have gone home to God, one from my childhood, Jean Tracy Forman whom I lost and found again, and one from my young adult years, Jean Cornella Bauer who has remained near and close over the decades despite geography intervening. I can still hear their voices and sometimes forget that they are gone. I so want them to still be here so I can call them up and laugh and cry with them and feel close again.

Friendship has been an important theme in popular culture and in the Holy Scriptures. Proverbs 18:24 says that “there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother”. Friendship is celebrated in song and in poetry and we are so blessed to have it in any measure. And when our best friends are also our loves we have the most special blessing. I am so thankful for this joy in my life especially as losses are par for the older years- and for all of us.

Songwriters Simon and Garfunkel sang of “Old friends, old friends, sit on the park bench like book ends….memory brushes the same years, silently sharing the same fears….” As Simon and Garfunkel did not get along very well I wonder if they came to know in older years what they wrote about as young men. I hope they did. There is a closeness that needs no words, just proximity. And it is that proximity that I miss most now with loved ones far away yet close in heart.

Bill Withers sang “Lean On Me” – “Lean on me when you’re not strong, I’ll take your side, I’ll help you carry on….” That “leaning on” quality of friendship is very important and often a life saver. Carole King wrote that when you’re down and troubled and need a helping hand, “You’ve Got A Friend”. How reassuring that is. Stevie Wonder and also Dionne Warwick sang that when there are troubles “That’s What Friends are For”. How true that is. Cole Porter wrote “Friendship”-“If you’re ever in a jam, here I am…It’s friendship, friendship, just a perfect blendship…” And indeed it is.

Take a moment and reflect on your friends here. Friends from long ago, friends from your job or your school or church or place of worship, or your neighborhood. Old friends and new friends. They are very special, indeed! Friends who are loyal and present and friends you may have lost over time one way or the other. Friends who are lovers and lovers who are friends. Friends who are also family members, and friends who have become family. Friends who are near and far, and friends who have gone home to God. I am doing that now and saying thank you to each one. I hope they hear me. And if you want, reach out to a friend and share this with them, telling them how important they are to you. You don’t have to lose friends out of life’s busyness or benign neglect, you can be the one to reach out, and with the Golden Girls theme song say: “Thank you for being a friend!”

What A Friend We Have in Jesus

The above heading is also the title of an old hymn-an old hymn that simply writes the profound truth of our lives. “Are we weak and heavy laden? Cumbered with a load of care? Precious Savior still our refuge….In His arms he’ll take and shield us…We will find a solace there”…”take it to the Lord in prayer”. And that is what I want you to know- you are never alone although life can get pretty lonely. Jesus has called us friends as we seek to follow him in his Way of Love. He has promised us his Spirit to stay with us forever.

It is amazing to me that Jesus calls us friends. Some see the loving marital relationship as a paradigm of our relationship to God- but others, including myself see loving friendship as that paradigm. Jesus, in John 15, much of the chapter but particularly verses 9-17 talks about seeing us as beloved friends who share the work of the kin-dom of God with him.

“There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends….” (John 15:13)

“And you are my friends…I no longer speak of you as subordinates, because a subordinate doesn’t know a superior’s business, instead I call you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have learned from Abba God….” *John 15:15 (TIB) (Abba is akin to “Daddy”.)

We do not have a distant God, we have a God who shares with us, who loves us and who gave everything for us. We have a God who wants to communicate with us, to be near us, and to share the work with us.

I am so thankful for having a Divine Friend who is here when no one else is, who is always near, and who loves me and calls me friend! This amazes me and gives me both hope and comfort.

Bless you, my friends,

Pastor Judy Lee, RCWP,

Good Shepherd Ministries, Fort Myers, Florida

8/4/2023